Grandmother continues to forward unsourced, unsolicited Swine Flu email

swine-flu-pigSources say that there is no stopping this grandmother from sending these types of email. Critics are concerned that it will cause alarm and misdiagnosis.

According to Dr. Lindsay Peterborough of the Ernest Borgnine Centre for Influenza Studies, you can send any email to this particular grandmother and she will send you information on Swine Flu whether it is relevant to your original email or not. “For example you could be asking for her help in dealing with your children’s behaviour and instead of responding to your message she will send you a comparative list of the differences between the common cold and the H1N1 virus,” said Dr. Peterborough.

More to come on this and other stories here at Design Argument News.

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Inspirational talks to be banned from houses of worship

Inspirational talks given by spiritual leaders are to be banned according to sources close to God. Early reports suggest that they may be banned from all venues, not only to houses of worship. Experts say that inspirational talks are basically ineffective and that, although they may give a “tingly” feeling, the effects are not long-lasting and the individuals attending them are ultimately not transformed in any meaningful way.

It is not known when this will take place and already much opposition is being voiced by “inspirational” speakers who make their living or achieve their sense of identity from being able to temporarily lift the members of a congregation from their “normal” states of being.

Please stay tuned to this post for further information on this.

Here is an example of inspirational quote verbiage:

“Don’t find fault, find a remedy; anybody can complain.”
Henry Ford

Henry Ford (July 30, 1863 – April 7, 1947) was the American founder of the Ford Motor Company and father of modern assembly lines used in mass production. His introduction of the Model T automobile revolutionized transportation and American industry. He was also a notable antisemitic thinker who claimed that Jewish bankers caused World War II, among other anti-Jewish slander. Many were inspired by him.

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Poetry Hammer comes by to inspect the blog

3663claw_hammer

Watch Poetry Hammer very closely and you will see him move. Don’t blink! He’s nuts. He’ll do anything to make you believe that he is just an image on your computer screen!

He brings us a poetry fragment. Watch him! Don’t stop watching him.

from So Foolish / Silent Shine

Relate the structure
For the weaver is blind
You know you can’t contain
His mind.

Measures of time
The knots and the nines
Try to define
The design.

Tell me something
I’ve never heard
Open book
Fell out a word.

Entertain me
Inside of the rain
Entertainment
In the rain.

Poetry Hammer, 2009

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The Hen’s Wardrobe Analogy: a proof for the existence of a Tailor

hen design argument

O! Ye sanctimonious scoffers! Before ye lies the fiery coals of the discount clothing warehouse!

So it goes like this: suppose after a savory meal you poke your head out of the tent and go for a walk in the desert. While you are walking here and there you see a pile of rocks. The rocks would probably make very little impression on you as you know from experience that they fell from the sky.

Then you stumble upon a beautiful pocket watch (just like the one you are picturing in your mind right now.) This would also not startle you. You have seen many watches before as they have spontaneously come into existence in the desert dunes. The best watches at the best values are to be found in the endless sands of the desert.

Suddenly you see a hen going into a walk-in closet. You move closer until you can peek into the closet and there you see the hen’s wardrobe. Now you are startled. A simple desert hen is nothing new to you but the hen’s wardrobe makes you sweat more than does, say, the sun. How could there be a wardrobe for the hen? If the hen has a wardrobe then someone must have made the clothing for the hen. Therefore there must have been a Master Tailor fashioning these garments of wool, linen and silk.

From there you take the logical step that leads you to understand that this tailor must have also constructed the CN Tower in Toronto and the Florence Cathedral in Italy. Although these are made of coarser materials, you know it must be so.

This is the famous Hen’s Wardrobe Analogy, a fashion argument for the existence of an ultimate Tailor.

I like any old kind of chicken dance. This one works.

“But I never saw a chicken wear clothes” you rebut. Here is the proof silly.

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