Monthly Archives: December 2009

Communication

Bathroom Etiquette, Another Argument from Intelligent Design

From: [5WPR staffer]
To: “Email-Everyone”
Date: Mon, 21 May 2007 13:18:56 -0400
Subject: Bathroom – Last Warning
Whoever took a dump in the ladies room between this morning and now needs to go back in the bathroom to flush the toilet. In addition, the other stall has the flap on the tampon box open.

This is the absolute last time I’ll be asking the ladies in this office to have proper bathroom etiquette before we have locks installed in the bathroom and a sign in sheet for every time you use it.

I’ve got everyone on this e-mail copied, including Ronn [Torossian] and Adam because it’s beyond me why as professional women we don’t know how to keep the bathrooms in order for our colleagues, clients and potential new clients to use. How many times do I have to ask?

Again, this is the last warning.

Pick up after yourself, close the tampon box, wipe, clean and flush. If the toilet paper our hand soap runs out, please let Christine Garabedian know.

Thanks.

All the Best,

[5WPR staffer]

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Aish HaTorah Chose a Spokes-Animal to Represent Them

“F*** you very much,” Ronn Torossian, Aish Spokes-Animal


Content Opportunity, December, 23, 2009Aish HaTorah chose wisely when they picked 5WPR to represent their public relations issues. That is the same Aish that is an “apolitical” organization.

The Man Who Hears Things

Rabbi Dan Rand, Managing Director of Aish Toronto told Martin Goldstein that the primary mission of Aish HaTorah was to stop Jewish assimilation and intermarriage. Everything else was secondary including any spiritual development. Our guess is that the spiritual stuff is window dressing so as to distract from their primary goal. We believe that they will pursue their primary mission by any means necessary and if that includes lying about “bible codes” and propping up Kelleman’s silly arguments to make people feel intellectually “comfortable” to “be religious” then so be it.

Martin Goldstein has been through it all and seen how they work. He has witnessed what Rabbi Rand refers to as “Aish nuclear fallout” (we won’t say whom he was referring to). He has seen the internecine squabbles and witnessed the loshon harah (harmful speech). Basically he has seen the hypocrisy and corruption of the organization. An organization is corrupt when their primary mission is not declared publicly and they use a secondary mission as an obfuscation. They are lying to themselves and to the Jews who are looking to find some spiritual Judaism.

Martin Goldstein believes that Aish HaTorah is finding a measure of success in achieving their primary mission. But that success is coming at a cost. We do hope that they take this honest criticism to heart but we have faint hope of that since these are fundamentalists and fundamentalism is like a mountain that cannot be budged.

So it does not surprise us that Aish has chosen a man, Ronn Torossian, who embodies what Aish is as an institution. Nice on the outside, aggressive to the core and disdainful of other organizations or people who do not see things their way. Ronn is also a skilled manipulator and liar, perfect for the needs of Aish HaTorah.

Here from Gawker.com is the story of Ronn Torossian, the current Rebbe of Aish HaTorah:

When Ronn Torossian, the incompetent superflack and 5WPR CEO who reps characters ranging from softcore porn king Joe Francis to nutty televangelist Benny Hinn Ministries, sued his former HR director Melissa Weiss last week, he was using a classic PR tactic: getting out ahead of the story. Ronn alleged in his suit that Weiss helped an employee leave 5W, thereby violating her contract. But Weiss has her own side of the story: that she was fired because she protested extensive, ongoing labor violations at 5WPR. What we know—because we have the evidence—is that on Friday, Ronn sent Weiss an email threatening, “You will pay for the rest of your life for trying to ruin my business.” The subject line read, “YOU STUPID CUNT.”

It’s important to understand why we—and others—talk about Ronn Torossian so much. He and his firm are far from the biggest players in the PR industry, so it may seem strange that he gets so much attention. The real reason he matters is that he embodies the public’s worst ideas about what a PR person is: loud, brash, more flash than substance, dirty, manipulative, amoral, and, in the end, not particularly bright. The real movers and shakers in the PR industry achieved their positions partly by keeping their mouths shut. That doesn’t make them better people than Ronn, but it does make them wiser.

Most people would be surprised to find out how much time the average PR person spends worrying about their industry’s reputation as a den of lying bastards. Ronn has the touchiness, but not the reflective nature, of his peers. A few years ago I wrote an article in PRWeek calling him a self-promoter (a vast understatement), and we haven’t gotten along ever since. Each of us thinks the other is a jerk; I’m happy with that, and I assume he is too.

Mention 5W or Ronn to most people in the PR industry, and you will draw a chuckle or a roll of the eyes. Mention him to most reporters who have been the recipients of his ALL CAPS, nonsensical email blasts , and you’ll draw an even worse reaction. When I covered the PR industry for three years at PRWeek, I don’t recall ever hearing any unqualified praise of Ronn from anyone who was off the record. That’s not normal. He gets more press for himself than just about anybody else in PR, and consequently, has a huge effect on how people perceive the industry as a whole. And that drives a lot of people crazy, because he is just a terrible representative. Although, it must be said, he is colorful, and provides good copy—he embraces the (misguided) “all press is good press” philosophy, even if his peers wish he didn’t.

Hopefully, the emails below are evidence enough for the world to see exactly why Ronn inspires the feelings that he does. He will often brag about building his firm from the ground up, and his claims are true; to the extent that you admire unbridled entrepreneurship independent of any social value, you should admire Mr. Torossian. But fundamentally, he’s a hustler; and, as a PR professional, he has no idea what he’s doing.

According to Melissa Weiss’ lawyer, she found out soon after she was hired at 5W last month that Ronn was violating the law by miscategorizing employees and not paying them overtime. “Ms. Weiss reported these violations to Mr. Torossian and he threatened to fire her and any employee not happy with their status,” her lawyer writes. “Soon thereafter, Ms. Weiss was terminated and her final pay was withheld, leading her to bring a small claims action for her earned pay.”

Weiss’ story is not an unfamiliar one. We’ve received tips telling us the same thing. Among the claims, tipsters say that 5W does not pay overtime to low-level employees, in violation of labor law; that Ronn has docked employees for a full day’s pay, or a vacation day, for being 15 minutes late to work, causing several people to resign; and that employees don’t get proper comp time after working 7 days in a row or more.

On March 1, Ronn sent Weiss the following email, titled “YOUR CLAIMS”:

On March 7—last Friday, the same day that Torossian leaked his own lawsuit against Weiss—he sent her this email:

After Weiss got this “CUNT” message, her lawyer sent a cease-and-desist email to Ronn and his attorney. In it, he noted, “Ms. Weiss will be commencing further claims against 5W and Mr. Torossian individually. Furthermore, Ms. Weiss previously notified the Department of Labor of 5W’s labor violations and we will be cooperating with their investigation to the fullest extent.”

To that message, Ronn responded to Weiss and her attorney with this:

In short, a man who makes his living giving strategic advice to other people responded to a legal email by calling his former employee a “cunt,” and including her attorney on the email. Not much needs to be added to that.

We will note that Ronn does have his defenders—mainly, himself, and (some of) his current employees. Christine Garabedian, a five-year employee of 5W, writes us to say Ronn is an “amazing boss,” adding, “To anyone who would say ‘wow this girl obviously has been brain washed’ YOU ARE DEAD WRONG.”

About Melissa Weiss, Garabedian writes:

“Melissa Weiss came to 5W in 2008 and immediately began asking me “how can you take it here?”. As the HR director are these types of questions appropriate? I suddenly began to think that maybe Melissa was jealous of my success at 5W. As a 30 something, single women who still has her parents address listed on her taxes to avoid paying NYC taxes, I could see how she would be jealous of a successful 27 year old who is happy at her job. I love that she is so happy to say that 5W doesn’t follow regulations when she is the one cheating the government…

PS Melissa I just got engaged- Now are you even more jealous of me :)

Classic 5WPR.

Martin Goldstein says to Ronn Torossian, Aish Spokes-Animal: Sue me!

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Supreme Court Rules Goldstein Can “Defame” Aish HaTorah and 5WPR According to God’s Will

“You seem to be obsessed with my firm.”

Content Opportunity, December, 23, 2009 - Martin Goldstein and the Design Argument Initiative were very pleased that Canada’s top court yesterday issued a landmark ruling giving journalists, and others – including bloggers – who are publishing public interest information, a new and broader defence of “responsible communication” in cases where they may be sued or threatened with libel.

The new defence of “public interest responsible communication” recognizes that some factual errors may occur in day to day journalism but it makes provision for them to be excused when they occur in the “publication is on a matter of public interest” and when “the publisher was diligent in trying to verify the allegation.”

The Man Who Hears Things

“This gives me more liberty to say whatever I want about groups such as Aish, Chabad and Jews for Jesus,” said Goldstein at a champagne celebration he was was attending at the mansion of “the man who hears things”.

“The groups that Goldstein has been targeting are self-interested organizations that have deceived themselves into thinking that they are working for the benefit of their target market,” said a drunken Poetry “the Hammer” Hammer from the large indoor-outdoor swimming pool at the mansion of “the man who hears things.” Poetry Hammer claims that the actions of these missionizing groups would be completely heinous if it wasn’t for the fact that the people that they target have free will. “However, it is similar to multi-level marketing in how they get people involved. I feel ill when I think about it all. It could be that I drank too much mashka at the Chabad farbrengen at the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry.”

From Gawker.com:

“Incompetent flackery factory 5WPR has admitted to the internet sock puppetry we covered yesterday—posting fake comments on a blog on behalf of a client. That client, by the way, is a kosher slaughterhouse called Agriprocessors, which has long been under fire for workplace safety and immigration law violations. 5W CEO and paragon of employee satisfaction Ronn Torossian told The Forward that an investigation is underway to determine who’s responsible for the fake comments. But even though Ronn is a friend to Israel, he already has a Rabbi scared for his own safety. Shame! Incompetent shame:

Two of the postings in question were made in the name of Rabbi Morris Allen, a prominent critic of Agriprocessors and the founder of the Conservative movement’s Hekhsher Tzedek initiative, which is attempting to create ethical standards for the production of kosher food. The first of the comments purporting to come from Allen appeared with his name misspelled. The second, which was made midday on July 9, came at the same time that Allen was presiding over the funeral of his aunt in Omaha, Neb.

Grade-A flackery, that.

Allen told the Forward that the postings left him concerned for his safety and for the reputation of Hekhsher Tzedek.

“I’m increasingly concerned about my own safety because if you begin to engage in this kind of behavior, I just wonder where it ends,” he said.

Now they plan to sue 5W! And the blogger who originally uncovered the trolls spoke to a 5W VP who blamed the entire thing on a foolish intern. We’ve emailed him also, but haven’t heard back yet. We did hear back from Ronn late yesterday though, who said:

I am in mexico with my family. Just saw your note but as you have already posted, clearly my reply doesnt interest you. You seem to be obsessed with my firm.

Noted!”

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I return to blog

I am much better and can now blog from the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry checkers and playing cards room which was donated by The Jerusalem Fund of Aish HaTorah and the Clarion Fund. According to Clarion Fund’s incorporation papers, it is based at the same address as Aish Hatorah. The three founders of The Clarion Fund are or were full-time employees of Aish HaTorah. Raphael Shore, the leader of The Clarion Fund is also a full-time employee of Aish HaTorah. The Clarion Fund has collaborated with pro-Israel media watch organization HonestReporting in the production of its films. HonestReporting originally was a project of Aish Hatorah. Scandal! Scandal!

Of course I appreciate the room as it is a good space in which to use my laptop with high speed internet. Everything happens by God’s design, his intelligent design including the number of references to Aish.com, Aish Hatorah, Clarion, Ronn Torossian, 5wpr and the ludicrous assumption that Aish is apolitical. I have no doubt that this was all predicted in the famous Bible Codes which are used to impress Jews and make them not want to hook up with non-Jews.

My legs are sore. They are so sore! I have been running around the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry like a crazy man because I want to be fit for Nurse Crystal, my new love.

I am working on a piece about the strategic marketing alliance that Chabad and Jews for Jesus are entering into. I am pleased that this is happening since they have so much to offer each other. This venture may include the new group Jews for Ed Sullivan.

That is all the content that I will provide for now. Let this be a Clarion call for Truth, Beauty, Honesty, and Lovingkindness.

Nurse Crystal gets dinner ready

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Aish Hatorah, Obsession, Ron Torossian, and Radical Self-Deception

Martin Goldstein, who has recovered magnificently and should be returning to the Design Argument site very soon, has asked me to post the following article by Jeffrey Goldberg on the Design Argument blog. He knows that the article is not going to appear funny or poetic to other people but Martin shrieks with laughter whenever he reads this article. Here it is.

Now Jeffrey Goldberg has joined the chorus of critics:

Aish HaTorah denies any direct connection to the film (Obsession), which is designed to make naive Americans believe that B-52s filled with radical jihadists are about to carpet-bomb their churches, and are only awaiting Barack Obama’s ascension to launch the attack. But the manifold connections, as laid out in this article, among others, make it clear that high-level officials of Aish are up to their chins in this project. The most disreputable flack in New York, Ronn Torossian, who represents Aish, makes an appearance in this story, which was to be expected: Torossian last made the news when he employed sock-puppetry in defense of one of his many indefensible clients, Agriprocessors, Inc., the Luvavitch-owned kosher slaughterhouse that treats its employees nearly as badly as it treats its animals, which is saying something, because Agriprocessor slaughterers have been filmed ripping out the tracheas of living cattle.

But I digress. It’s said of Ronn Torossian that he represents “right-wing” Israeli politicians, but this description does not do his clients justice. “Right-wing” is Bibi Netanyahu. Torossian represents the lunatic fringe. Several years ago, in one of my only encounters with him, he introduced me to Benny Elon, a rabbi and settler leader who was then Israel’s tourism minister, and who, at various points in his career, has more or less advocated the ethnic cleansing of Israel of its Arab citizens. At one point, when Elon had gone to take a telephone call, Torossian and I started talking about Israel’s right to reprisal for terrorist attacks. I was arguing in favor of some sort of proportionality (this was after Jenin, in which the Israeli army chose to root out terrorism block by block rather than bomb the city from the air) but Torossian interrupted: “I think we should kill a hundred Arabs or a thousand Arabs for every one Jew they kill.” I was somewhat taken aback, of course, because this is a Nazi idea, rather than a Jewish idea. I asked him to explicate: “If someone from a town blows himself up and kills Jews, we should wipe out the town he’s from, kill them all. The Israelis are suckers. They should have destroyed Jenin.” He went on like this for some time. I would only note that Torossian, to the best of my knowledge, never volunteered for the Israeli army, so he seemed to me by definition a chickenhawk.

Torossian’s attitude toward Arabs and toward the peace process are echoed in the approach of Aish HaTorah, which is just about the most fundamentalist movement in Judaism today. Its operatives flourish in the radical belt of Jewish settlements just south of Nablus, in the northern West Bank, and their outposts across the world propagandize on behalf of a particularly sterile, sexist and revanchist brand of Judaism. Which is amusing, of course, because “Obsession” is meant to expose a particularly sterile, sexist and racist brand of Islam.

The tragedy of “Obsession” is not that it is wrong; the tragedy is that it takes a serious issue, and a serious threat—that of Islamism—and makes it into a cartoon. Its central argument is that the “Islamofascism” of today is not only the equivalent of Nazism, but worse than Nazism. This is quite a thing for a Jewish organization to argue. One of the featured speakers in “Obsession” is a self-described “former PLO terrorist” named Walid Shoebat, who argues on film that a “secular dogma like Nazism is less dangerous than Islamofascism is today.”

The previous Aish Rebbe

The previous Aish Rebbe

This is lunacy, of course. Islamism isn’t Nazism. It’s bad enough without being labeled Nazism. Martin Gilbert, the biographer of Churchill, shows up in the film as well, and doesn’t cover himself in glory: “History has an unfortunate habit of always repeating itself,” he says. Always? Does this mean that the Arabs are right now constructing death camps for the Jewish citizens of Israel?

Just unbelievable, but the most unbelievable part of the “Obsession” campaign is its timing: What does this film have to do with Barack Obama? The film is meant to suggest that Obama will provide aid and comfort to Islamism, or is an Islamist himself. There is not one shred of proof on this planet that Barack Obama is anything other than an Israel-supporting Christian. Yes, he went to party with Rashid Khalidi. So did I. Does that make me a member of Hezbollah?

The current Aish Rebber

The current Aish Rebbe

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Content Opportunity

Avoid Bogart-Bacall Syndrome

This purpose of this post is to move the picture of Lauren Bacall of the previous post further down the page.

The Bogart-Bacall Syndrome

What happens when you speak lower than your vocal comfort zone for continuous periods of time?

You might adopt that Hollywood sound Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall were famous for, but you may get more than just the sound… you might get the syndrome!

On aish.com it says: “In his newest movie, “Diamonds,” Michael Douglas stars as a former boxing champion who, in his twilight years, is a widower recovering from a stroke. The movie’s title is inspired by its plot, where his character teams up with his son and grandson to recover some diamonds they suspect were stolen from him. It also stars Dan Ackroyd and Lauren Bacall.”

Lauren Bacall was born Betty Joan Perske on September 16, 1924, the only child of William and Natalie (Weinstein-Bacal) Perske. Her father was a salesman from Alsace; her mother, the daughter of German-Rumanian immigrants, worked as an executive secretary. After they were divorced, her mother took the “Bacal” part of her maiden name. (Later, Bacall added another “l”, and “Lauren” was a Hollywood addition.)

Lauren Bacall Whistle

Evidence that we ignore that Impermanence is built into the design of the universe

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