New Ceremony

The new ceremony involves things that a person can do in 3 minutes or less.

That includes (possibly):

  • going to the bathroom
  • lighting incense
  • washing your hands
  • trimming your nails
  • reading a newspaper article
  • making a tweet on twitter
  • rubbing hand cream on
  • taking a painkiller
  • watching 3 minutes of tv
  • going on facebook for only 3 minutes
  • eating an apple
  • thinking of something for only 3 minutes
  • typing patek philippe 4907/ij
  • typing aish hatorah

The list is as long as your imagination is broad. The New Ceremony begins when you decide what you will do to fill the 3 minutes.

Then you will make a determination that the New Ceremony is not your invention but rather something that has a divine source. You will need a chemist for any substances that are beyond your ability to blend or mix. You must bear in mind that you will release all of your Old Ceremonies and purify yourself for the New Ceremony.

*********************************************

Once upon a time, not that long ago and not that far away, there were two people that believed they were husband and wife. This “couple” had been together for over 14 years not realizing that they had never been wed or that they shared nothing in common. They were spoiled by too much tv and an overactive world. You could say they were in a constant process of teething.

Mordecai Singer was the quickest friend to pick up on the fact that they were likely not married nor were they represented by Ronn Torossian. They attended many functions together and their families kept quiet about what was going on – if they were even aware. Then they attempted a New Ceremony.

They were aware of the 3 minute limitation. They only had to agree about the focus of the ceremony. They already decided that the activity they would be engaging in was to sing “You Are My Sunshine”. The focus could be about thanksgiving, about death, or it could be about their “marriage”. They decided that the focus would be on their marriage.

They commenced to sing and they simultaneously realized that what they had previously thought was a happy children’s song was actually quite sad and ironic.

You Are My Sunshine

The other night dear, as I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken
So I hung my head and I cried.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

I’ll always love you and make you happy,
If you will only say the same.
But if you leave me and love another,
You’ll regret it all some day:

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

You told me once, dear, you really loved me
And no one else could come between.
But not you’ve left me and love another;
You have shattered all of my dreams:

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me
When I awake my poor heart pains.
So when you come back and make me happy
I’ll forgive you dear, I’ll take all the blame.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

Wedding Rabbi Shari

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Rabbi Emmanuel Rabinovich at a seance

african negroidIt is dangerous to mention the Negroid racial category. It must be made clear that the breakup of a relationship was possibly rooted in a reckless but positive discussion of members of this race at an Ethiopian restaurant last Saturday night.

As has already been said, Negroid is a racial category – one of the three “great races” – divided again into subtypes by the Caucasoid and the Mongoloid races. Populations included in the category in the 19th century and early 20th century were the black people of sub-Saharan Africa, the Australian Aboriginals, the Melanesian and Negrito. During the 1950s, the Australian Aborigines, the Negritos, and the Melanesians, as well as the Papuans (the inhabitants of New Guinea) were referred to as the Australoid race.

The concept originated with the typological method of racial classification and is still used by many anthropologists, especially physical anthropologists working in the forensic field of craniofacial anthropometry.

Thanks for all the convoluted Wikipedia content on the Negroid but what about Caucasians? Can we talk about them at McDonald’s? Will talk of this race possibly break up a relationship?

Skin Stripped from this Caucassian in order to avoid offending those of a darker skin tone!

Blumenbach_beautiful_Georgian_skullIn scientific racism, the term Caucasian race (or Caucasoid, sometimes also Europid, or Europoid) has been used to denote the general physical type of some or all of the indigenous human populations of Europe, North Africa, the Horn of Africa, West Asia, Central Asia, and South Asia.

In common use in American English, the term “Caucasian” (rarely supplemented with “race”) is sometimes restricted to Europeans and other lighter-skinned populations within these areas, and may be considered equivalent to the varying definitions of white people. The term continues to be widely used in many scientific and general contexts, usually with its more restricted sense of “white”, specifically White American in a US context.

What does that have to do with Rabbi Rabinovich attending a seance?

seance circleRabbi Rabinovich is an authentic fictitious character created by anti-semites, Even so, it is very rare for a Rabbi to attend a seance.

The seance involved a meeting of people who gathered to listen to a spirit medium discourse with and relay messages from the spirit of a dead relationship. Rabbi Rabinovich is always interested in helping couple get together even when they don’t want to. A little known fact about relationships is that they often break up. Sometimes the break up is mutually decided upon. Other times the break up is initiated by one of the partners usually under false pretenses to supposedly cushion the blow to the other party. Often the person who initiates the break up will do so because they have no real interest in being in a long term relationship and find a “reason” to break up to assuage their conscience.

Mud happens. Rabbi Rabinovich is as fictional as this relationship was.

There are more members of the Negroid racial category in the National Basketball Association. That is verifiable. It is not fiction.

Just a little joke before I end: A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says “Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!”. Billy says, “Ok mommy.” and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams “MOMMY! I’m still blind, my wish didn’t come true!“, the mom answered, “I know – April Fools!

Rose Rabbinovich had no comment.

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Sentimental Over God – Email Sent

God!

I remember the tent that we shared that night long ago.

I remember the sparkle that was in Your eyes.

When will You return?

Much Love,

Martin

p.s. I found Your email address in an old box of Martin Luther King Jr. speeches.

zyklon b

Empty Zyklon B poison gas canisters at Auschwitz-Birkenau.

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Papaji visits the Design Argument – Show me God

Papaji – Show me God

God is everywhere. Those who are not innocent cannot see him. The veil between you and God is only doubt.

Aish Emet.

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