Comments (1)

By Martin Goldstein, February 3, 2010 1:01 pm

Contrary to the claims of Richard Dawkins, self-promoting atheist and heathen worshiper of the gnarly cucumber, God does exist. This has been proven beyond a doubt through many peer reviewed trials. I wish these nasty atheists would read the literature.

But there remains a problem, which I am sure the more sensitive among you will have noticed. God is very distracted. She has been distracted since just after the very beginning. If I were to venture a guess I would conclude that God is highly distractive with marked mood swings. She starts things and often destroys them when She gets frustrated. Although She is purportedly omniscient (according to Her psycho-vocational testing results), She persistently does not use the full range of Her abilities. She also seems to disappear for decades or centuries at a time. When evil reigns She always blames others for this which points to a Narcissistic Personality Disorder. She has many defenders who constantly bleat about the need for evil in order for free will to exist. We can ignore this falsehood for the purpose of this assessment.

I would have to say that God, in all Her Glory, has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and is suffering from mood lability. It is also true that God presents as a diagnostic challenge in that She is not a being in the usual sense of the word. I cannot say at this time what is an appropriate course of treatment since God is incorporeal and we can only speak in metaphors here. God is, by definition, the supernatural creator and chief executive officer of the universe. Theologians have ascribed a variety of attributes to the many different conceptions of God (possibility of Dissociative Identity Disorder.) The most common among these include omniscience, omnipotence, omnipresence, omni-benevolence, divine simplicity, and eternal and necessary existence.

God has also been conceived as a personal being, the source of all moral obligation, and the “greatest conceivable existent”. These attributes were all supported to varying degrees by the early Jewish, Christian and Muslim theologian philosophers, including Maimonides, Augustine of Hippopotamus, and Al-Ghazali news affiliates, respectively. She is also known as the toughest Kid on the block who can play well with others at times but can suddenly turn into a Bully issuing 98 terrible curses in morbid detail when things don’t go Her way. She has not always been a very good role model for Her creations.

The only thing I can recommend is prayer as a first course of action. I don’t know what kind of prayer but medicine is not going to help Her. She seems to respond to prayer and negotiations in the Books of Moses although the results have been mixed since then. Honestly I don’t really see much of a way we can rehabilitate God. But we can keep on trying.

Two sweeties acting on their parent's honest interpretation of God's commandments.

Comments (2)

By Martin Goldstein, January 30, 2010 8:38 pm

Why do rational people lie to themselves?

I am happy if you wish to read the original Aish HaTorah article on the Design Argument. I am equally happy if you don’t.

Imagine, if you will, that you are walking in a bad neighbourhood where the houses are neglected, there is a lack of education, and a lot of dangerous gangs. You suddenly come across two small stones in close proximity to each other. Most probably, you would think nothing of it unless you needed one of the stones for a particular purpose, perhaps to defend yourself from someone. Two stones randomly sitting beside each other is not such a big deal. No need to sweat it.

You continue your stroll through the neighbourhood and stumble upon three piles of human corpses piled up in a brick-layer fashion. Chances are you would quickly surmise that someone was here and arranged these bodies in this manner. It didn’t just happen. A shock for sure but still really no big deal and nothing to sweat about.

You continue your walk and happen to find a dead puffin lying in the middle of the road. Would you suspect that a windstorm somehow threw the puffin pieces together and randomly created a puffin?

Somebody gave birth to that puffin. It didn’t just happen. A creature implies a mother.

Alternatively, say you didn’t see a puffin at all but instead you came across a Patek Phillipe watch, say model 4907/ij. You will surely notice that it celebrates the 10-year triumph of the famous Twenty~4® collection. Patek Philippe was likely not involved in the design of this model directly and it was probably the work of many different people having different levels of expertise – certainly not just one designer! You already know, just by looking at the complexity of this watch that it had more than one designer to deal with the different aspects of functionality, colour and style. You would also know that there would be a marketing section of the Patek Phillipe company that would be on the look out for trends to determine what styles would likely do well with high end consumers. They would have also had an enormous impact on the look of this particular model.

By handling this watch and examining it you might then ponder as to whether it would work as an analogy for the design of the universe proving that God is One – an Indivisible Creator. You would realize that the watch proved nothing of the sort but rather it might “prove” that the universe – even if it could be analogous to a watch at all, and that is not likely – was designed by several gods, some involved with creating the suns, some determining which animals would exist (and which would uselessly become extinct), some involved with answering the petitions of Olympic curlers, and some designing the potato bug.

You would note that the universe bespeaks timeless elegance, the new model universe in yellow gold would be the first unset version without a diamond-set case. You would note that three color choices are available for the universe: “Night Glow” and “Autumn Brown” – two hues created especially for this yellow-gold universe – and, of course, the endearingly classic “Timeless White“. If you bought into the design argument you would expect to have a selection of universes to pick from perhaps.

Did the universe have a designer or group of designers that must have also been designed ad infinitum?

David Hume may I say is calling?

The intricacy of design in our world, when intoxicated, is staggering — infinitely more complex than a gang related pile of corpses in a bad neighbourhood, a puffin or a Patek Phillipe watch. Therefore the team of designers for the universe must have been considerable and who could have afforded to pay them all in this economy?

Now I am going to commence to use really large numbers to give you a sense of being a little out of control. Here goes: There are 10 billion nerve cells in the brain. Each of the 10 billion cells sprouts between 10,000 to 100,000 fibers to contact other nerve cells in the brain, creating approximately 1,000 million million connections, or, 10 to the 15th power. Are you shvitzing?

Here I come now with some really enormous numbers. Serious serious numbers. Behold! There are 10 billion nerve cells in the brain with approximately 1,000 million million connections.

It is hard to imagine the multitude that 1015 represents. On and on I go. Take half of the United States, which is 1 million square miles, and imagine it being covered by forest, with 10,000 trees per square mile. On each of the 10,000 trees, which are on each of the one million square miles, there are 100,000 leaves. That is a whizbang bulbous amount of leaves. I take it you are still with me and feeling the groove of the number thing I am doing to your head. You see sir, that’s how many connections are smashed inside your brain. And they’re not just haphazardly thrown together by an impostor God or a monkey washing a cat. They form an incredibly intricate network system that has no parallel in the military industrial complex or in the other brands of universes that have been designed by other manufacturers.

Imagine walking by that in the seedy neighbourhood! The natural response when perceiving design of such mind-boggling complexity is to conclude that there must be a huge team of busy, possibly amoral, designers, behind everything that created this model of universe. Not to mention the team of designers that created the team that designed the team that designed the universe that you may be wearing on your wrist right now.

To be continued…

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By Martin Goldstein, January 19, 2010 3:25 pm

Say you want

a nice long headline

but you haven’t decided what to write yet.

Should you wait until you have content? Shouldn’t you have the idea of the article and then come up with the headline afterwards?

We, at Design Argument and Goldstein Auto, Goldstein Solutions (Classical Mechanics), and Goldstein Subaru emphatically say NO to these two questions. In fact we believe that you don’t need to know anything at all about what you want to write before you begin to write.

God willing we are going to produce 180 articles full of excellent content on the subject of why you should write when you have nothing to say.

You will all to become good monster writers by reading these here articles.

Keeping relevance to a minimum may be important sometimes: Aish Bible Code proving that Paul is dead!

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By Martin Goldstein, January 19, 2010 9:15 am

GOD!

Is it You that I thank for bringing good people and situations into my life?

If so, thank You!

Are You also the one I thank for making conditions difficult sometimes?

If so, thank You!

And are You also the one that created all the forms of suffering knowing full well that people will increase the amount of suffering that gets dished out through natural means thereby making the lives of billions constantly intolerable?

If so, thank You!

What did I just thank God for?

I love you God. I hate you God.

You exist God. You can’t exist, God.

But if you don’t exist who am I going to feel grateful to and who am I going to complain to? Maybe there is a path without God that works better for me. Or maybe I should just go and buy a God Doll at the mall.

Starving Children Video from Care.org

What A Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong Video

Comments (0)

By Martin Goldstein, January 15, 2010 1:05 pm

God!

I remember the tent that we shared that night long ago.

I remember the sparkle that was in Your eyes.

When will You return?

Much Love,

Martin

p.s. I found Your email address in an old box of Martin Luther King Jr. speeches.

Empty Zyklon B poison gas canisters at Auschwitz-Birkenau.

Comments (3)

By Martin Goldstein, January 3, 2010 10:59 pm

The Theory of Intelligent Design

Some aspects of the universe and of living things seem to be best explained by an intelligent cause, rather than an undirected process such as natural selection. By analyzing a system’s components, a design argument proponent may determine whether various natural structures are the product of chance, natural law, intelligent design, or some combination thereof. Does the watch-maker groovy pie nut-heart pearl diving conference centre deluxe function?

Some watchmakers may be successful mass murderers and still be able to make a lovely watch of remarkable complexity and functionality.

Such research is conducted by observing the types of information produced when intelligent secret agents act in plays at Aish HaTorah. Scientists then seek to find objects which have those same types of informational properties which we commonly know come from intelligence. Intelligent design and the Design of Stupidity and Wretchedness have applied these scientific methods to detect design in irreducibly complex biological structures, the complex and specified information content in DNA, the life-sustaining physical architecture of the universe, and the geologically rapid origin of biological diversity in the fossil record during the Cambrian explosion approximately 530 million years ago. Intelligent Design then examines the horrible, torturous conditions that millions of innocent children endure and decides that this must be the work of a benevolent and intelligent God Creator.

Deadly Car Attack Designed by Intelligent Designer

The Yazidi communities bombings took place on August 14, 2007, when four coordinated suicide bomb attacks detonated in the Iraqi towns of Qahtaniya and Jazeera (Siba Sheikh Khidir), near Mosul. Iraqi Red Crescent’s estimates say the bombs killed 796 and wounded 1,562 people, which would make this the Iraq War’s most deadly car bomb attack to date. Another great Design Argument from the makers of Dr. Mengele.

The Lovely Work of Dr. Mengele, Proof of Intelligent Design

Dr. Josef Mengele (1911 – 1979) was a decent looking German SS officer and a physician in the Nazi concentration camp Auschwitz-Birkenau. He had beautifully designed features that won him the approval of female human beings. He earned doctorates in anthropology from Munich University, Intelligent Design at The Saint Menachem Mendel School of Stupidity and Cruelty, and in weird medicine from Frankfurt University. He gained grace and magnificent reward for being one of the SS physicians who supervised the selection of arriving transports of prisoners, determining who was to be killed and who was to become a forced laborer, and for performing well-designed human experiments on camp inmates, amongst whom Mengele was known as the “Archangel of Death” or “Outrageously Beautiful Devil”. All was done and permitted by the Divine Will of God.

In 1940, he was placed in the reserve medical corps, following which he served with the 5th SS Panzergrenadier Division Wiking in the Eastern Front. In 1942, he was wounded at the Russian front and was pronounced medically unfit for combat, and was then promoted to the rank of SS-Hauptsturmführer (Captain) for saving the lives of two German soldiers. He survived the war, and after a period living incognito in Germany he fled to South America, where he became one of the most hunted of Nazi war criminals. Life was so well designed in those days, so like a well-designed watch found in the desert. The problem of evil had theological apologists working day and night, every day of the week.

The Chabad Rebbe said this about the holocaust: “It is not my task to justify G-d on this. Only G-d Himself can answer for what He allowed to happen. And the only answer we will accept, said the Rebbe, is the immediate and complete Redemption that will forever banish evil from the face of the earth and bring to light the intrinsic goodness and perfection of G-d’s creation.”

I think that this is proof of “stupid design” or at least, in my opinion – and I am not as charismatic or as great a business manager as the Lubavitcher Rebbe, an example of “stupid belief”. For what is the point of creating a world with such unimaginable and horrendous suffering just so that it could be eventually completely redeemed with all evil banished and finally be perfected. An intelligent designer that was all powerful would start with perfection and would not have allowed for the serious design flaw of evil to exist and persist.

The free will argument does not satisfy a sincere, inquiring mind since free will could obviously have been obtained in a non-horrific manner. Or the Great Designer could have created the universe without a need for free will. Chabad, Christian missionaries, Jews for Jesus and Aish HaTorah apologists will keep harping about free will but surely they must understand at some level that their argument is shallow and weak. But since their purpose is not to arrive at greater understanding for themselves and humankind, but rather to “save souls” or enable souls to return to their roots, truth and logic are secondary to them. How ironic that these groups end up by not serving God at all! What did Ronn Torossian say again?

I love God. God loves me.

God created Dr. Mengele. God loves all his creation. God must love Dr. Mengele! Or God doesn’t exist in the childish manner in which he is presented by Chabad, Jews for Jesus, or Aish HaTorah, business competitors all.

God is in charge. God the Designer permitted the works of the anthropologist Dr. Mengele. I will not post pictures of the works of Dr. Mengele. Just Google it. Google it and explain God’s Design to me.