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Posts tagged: menachem mendel

Supreme Court Rules Goldstein Can “Defame” Aish HaTorah and 5WPR According to God’s Will

By Content Opportunity, December 23, 2009 12:43 pm

“You seem to be obsessed with my firm.”

Content Opportunity, December, 23, 2009 - Martin Goldstein and the Design Argument Initiative were very pleased that Canada’s top court yesterday issued a landmark ruling giving journalists, and others – including bloggers – who are publishing public interest information, a new and broader defence of “responsible communication” in cases where they may be sued or threatened with libel.

The new defence of “public interest responsible communication” recognizes that some factual errors may occur in day to day journalism but it makes provision for them to be excused when they occur in the “publication is on a matter of public interest” and when “the publisher was diligent in trying to verify the allegation.”

The Man Who Hears Things

“This gives me more liberty to say whatever I want about groups such as Aish, Chabad and Jews for Jesus,” said Goldstein at a champagne celebration he was was attending at the mansion of “the man who hears things”.

“The groups that Goldstein has been targeting are self-interested organizations that have deceived themselves into thinking that they are working for the benefit of their target market,” said a drunken Poetry “the Hammer” Hammer from the large indoor-outdoor swimming pool at the mansion of “the man who hears things.” Poetry Hammer claims that the actions of these missionizing groups would be completely heinous if it wasn’t for the fact that the people that they target have free will. “However, it is similar to multi-level marketing in how they get people involved. I feel ill when I think about it all. It could be that I drank too much mashka at the Chabad farbrengen at the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry.”

From Gawker.com:

“Incompetent flackery factory 5WPR has admitted to the internet sock puppetry we covered yesterday—posting fake comments on a blog on behalf of a client. That client, by the way, is a kosher slaughterhouse called Agriprocessors, which has long been under fire for workplace safety and immigration law violations. 5W CEO and paragon of employee satisfaction Ronn Torossian told The Forward that an investigation is underway to determine who’s responsible for the fake comments. But even though Ronn is a friend to Israel, he already has a Rabbi scared for his own safety. Shame! Incompetent shame:

Two of the postings in question were made in the name of Rabbi Morris Allen, a prominent critic of Agriprocessors and the founder of the Conservative movement’s Hekhsher Tzedek initiative, which is attempting to create ethical standards for the production of kosher food. The first of the comments purporting to come from Allen appeared with his name misspelled. The second, which was made midday on July 9, came at the same time that Allen was presiding over the funeral of his aunt in Omaha, Neb.

Grade-A flackery, that.

Allen told the Forward that the postings left him concerned for his safety and for the reputation of Hekhsher Tzedek.

“I’m increasingly concerned about my own safety because if you begin to engage in this kind of behavior, I just wonder where it ends,” he said.

Now they plan to sue 5W! And the blogger who originally uncovered the trolls spoke to a 5W VP who blamed the entire thing on a foolish intern. We’ve emailed him also, but haven’t heard back yet. We did hear back from Ronn late yesterday though, who said:

I am in mexico with my family. Just saw your note but as you have already posted, clearly my reply doesnt interest you. You seem to be obsessed with my firm.

Noted!”

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I return to blog

By Martin Goldstein, December 22, 2009 8:16 pm

I am much better and can now blog from the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry checkers and playing cards room which was donated by The Jerusalem Fund of Aish HaTorah and the Clarion Fund. According to Clarion Fund’s incorporation papers, it is based at the same address as Aish Hatorah. The three founders of The Clarion Fund are or were full-time employees of Aish HaTorah. Raphael Shore, the leader of The Clarion Fund is also a full-time employee of Aish HaTorah. The Clarion Fund has collaborated with pro-Israel media watch organization HonestReporting in the production of its films. HonestReporting originally was a project of Aish Hatorah. Scandal! Scandal!

Of course I appreciate the room as it is a good space in which to use my laptop with high speed internet. Everything happens by God’s design, his intelligent design including the number of references to Aish.com, Aish Hatorah, Clarion, Ronn Torossian, 5wpr and the ludicrous assumption that Aish is apolitical. I have no doubt that this was all predicted in the famous Bible Codes which are used to impress Jews and make them not want to hook up with non-Jews.

My legs are sore. They are so sore! I have been running around the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry like a crazy man because I want to be fit for Nurse Crystal, my new love.

I am working on a piece about the strategic marketing alliance that Chabad and Jews for Jesus are entering into. I am pleased that this is happening since they have so much to offer each other. This venture may include the new group Jews for Ed Sullivan.

That is all the content that I will provide for now. Let this be a Clarion call for Truth, Beauty, Honesty, and Lovingkindness.

Nurse Crystal gets dinner ready

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Nurse Crystal and the Goldstein Solution

By Poetry Hammer, December 19, 2009 4:18 pm

If all we wanted were Goldstein Problems and Goldstein Solutions then what fun would life be? Fortunately we have Nurse Crystal (shown below in her attire and attitude when she is not working as a nurse at the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry.) Crystal is the executive directrix of Harlotry Operations at Saint Menachem Mendel.

It is stated again that Martin has no plans to begin a company named either Goldstein Auto or Goldstein Subaru.

Crystal merges with Lauren Bacall in this photograph of a female human being designed by Design Energy Consortium

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Big Coconuts

By Poetry Hammer, December 19, 2009 11:14 am

Song by Poetry Hammer, performed by Martin Goldstein and Design Argument at the Saint Menachem Mendel Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry

I got a thousand dollar suit
And a mighty big cheroot
But I gotta get through to you
Don’t want your toodle-oo

Sentimental fool around with you
Sad sack ain’t new to you
Yeah I’m gonna be true to you
Watch your Daddy get zooed

‘Cause you got big coconuts
Crazy big coconuts
Cruel you

You were Cassandra in my high school
Pollyanna in my swimming pool
I can’t listen to the daily news
I’m back in Ghana with my pito booze

I send a message with my sports car
I got a shiny new sushi bar
I can’t hear you when you live so far
I want to take you to my flower jar

Yes you got big coconuts
Crazy big coconuts
Cruel you

Fat cat in the chat room
Got tanked with Willy
Had tea with Tilly
Now I’m point blank silly

I own a fashion institute
Sloop Daddy want to shmooze with you
Don’t panic, keep your fuse
Look at Daddy’s new shoes

Ain’t you got big coconuts
Crazy big coconuts
Cruel you

(I am a sailor of the zodiac,
I ain’t no maniac)

The Chairman of the Board and Dino listen to “Big Coconuts” at Saint Menachem Mendel’s Centre for Rehabilitation and Harlotry

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